A Winter's Night
by Drowned In The Black Lagoon
Summary: Anna has a restless night, plagued by doubts, nightmares, and mulling over recent events. Elsa considers her own doubts and motives while she takes the first tentative steps towards changing her relationship with her sister entirely. Both come to conclusions of their own when they come together at last. Lesbian sexual content and intimacy between fictional sisters throughout.
1. The Dying Fire

It was late at night and bare branches scraped against the icy windowpane - the fire she built earlier was now down to smoldering embers and ash in Anna's fireplace. Cold moonlight streamed in through the irregular glass of the window nearest her bed, and cast milky light on the stone floor. The redhead was clad in a rough grey nightshirt and bundled deep under her covers, reindeer and bear furs clutched around her thin frame, and still she shivered and her pale skin rose in gooseflesh. Something had awoken her, a thump of snow falling off the roof perhaps, or a bird crying outside in the night. Either way she had come awake and found she was freezing, her hair a mess and mouth feeling dry and parched. She contemplated a moment, hearing the ticking of the loud ornate clock in a nearby room, wondering if she dared brave the cold air and stick an arm out to grab for the pitcher of water on her nightstand when she heard a noise again - the one that had awoken her, repeating?

The sound came again - a distant door closing firmly, maybe. Anna rolled onto her back and took a deep breath, puffed out her cheeks and shivered lightly before hugging herself. If only she could...but no. She shouldn't think those things, she would not bother the Queen at this time of night for such foolishness. Best to bite her tongue and keep it to herself, lest she damage the fragile relationship her sister and her were rebuilding.

It had been several months since that strange, confusing day on the ice. She had been scared to death for her sister, for herself, and her body had hurt and ached. Elsa was in danger and she had to find her, that has been all she had known as she pushed forward, but then everything just seemed to - stop. Like she had been encased in a thick fog. She could hear sounds distantly, people shouting her name, but she was locked in place and couldn't see, only hear the creaking of ice and the frantic pounding of her heart. In the aftermath, all she knew was Elsa had saved her from the shard of ice lodged in her heart, had righted the wrongs she had inadvertently caused. Anna had come around to find her sister holding her tight, near to crying, and that she felt safe and whole again.

Some nights she still had nightmares about what happened to her, fragmented and startling dreams where she saw herself from outside her body: she was made of ice, falling over and shattering, or choking to death as she was unable to breathe underwater, or Elsa towering over her with jagged icicles protruding from her skin, her eyes dead white and indifferent. On those nights she was lucky to get back to sleep and often had to rise to stoke a new fire and huddle close to it, too unsure to attempt sleep once more and too scared to seek out her sister in the dark watches of the night.

When all the visitors had gone and Elsa was restored as Queen, many things changed - but for the better it would turn out. Elsa soothed her if she seemed distressed about nightmares in the daytime though Anna never shared much about them, and the sisters again grew close and bonded after their long separation dating back to their childhood, and the period when Elsa has fled the kingdom for the distant mountains out of fear and guilt. Anna now got to be with her sister every day, and Elsa no longer seemed so scared or distant as the days passed. She no longer tried to push Anna away or seemed hesitant in her presence, thankfully. They could talk and laugh and spent hours together, frequently attending necessary meetings, but stealing away in the evening to dine together or relax by a fire. Elsa would make it snow indoors just for amusement at times, or make beautiful crystalline structures outside the windows for Anna to exclaim over, and she always seemed glad when Anna couldn't resist and hugged her or snuggled up close to her. The sisters talked of old times, and new adventures they might undertake together when time allowed.

With time Elsa also seemed to stop being constantly worried her abilities would harm others at random, and she smiled more and tended to seem slightly more open and relaxed (though still she chose to comport herself regally mostly and could be counted on to act, at least in public view, as though she were aloof with most people save her younger sister). She was different again around Anna when they were alone: more often to smile and warm with praise and expressed sentiment.

All the same, sometimes the younger girl was unsettled around Elsa for no reason she could easily pin down - sometimes her older sister got a strange look in her eyes, and Anna might look up from their meal or a book she was reading to find Elsa gazing at her with a slightly strange grin on her face and her eyes seeming to reflect some shifting, icy pattern from an unknown source. Whenever this happened, the younger sister would often shiver involuntarily no matter the warmth of the room, as if a cold wind had brushed her neck. It was as if the silver-haired young woman was scrutinizing her for some unknown purpose, examining her almost hungrily, like a timberwolf stalking a reindeer, and being unable to look away from the intended prey as she was so fixated on the sight.

But even when this happened, it was soon over, and if spoken to in such a state Elsa remained warm and caring in speech and doted on the princess, telling her amusing observations she may have had during the day's duties or just holding her hand softly. This eased the younger girl's mind, and she mostly overlooked those times when Elsa got such strange looks in her eyes. Overall Anna was overjoyed inside at the way their relationship had flowered and how much Elsa had opened to her, both in words and action taken to involve the younger girl in affairs of ruling and having her by her side all day, and the way she seemed to want to seek out the redhead even when duty didn't dictate they should work together on some matter of state. After the dire events that led to Elsa being captured and threatened with death, and her spectacular rescue of the kingdom and saving her younger sister from her strange fate and potential demise, it seemed she no longer stand to be separate from Anna for any appreciable length of time.

Anna relished the attention and time with her beloved sister after the years of separation, but more and more she couldn't stop her mind from wandering to thoughts she would quickly shove aside. Elsa was her sister, after all, and even if things had not worked out with Kristoff in the aftermath of the dramatic events the new Queen had participated in, she could not let the feelings she was experiencing about her older sister show or become known. She sometimes drifted down the hall towards Elsa's bedchamber at night, indecisive, knowing she'd be admitted if she told Elsa she was unable to sleep or wanted to talk - but then what should we say, what could she do? Surely what she pictured and imagined was unacceptable, a bizarre passing fancy.

All the same, she never had felt so happy before as when her sister hugged her close or clutched her hand in greeting, or when she grew drowsy as they relaxed together by a roaring fire and Elsa would let Anna rest her head on her shoulder, arm lightly about the younger girl, softly stroking her arm or neck. During the latter times, Anna would go totally still, breathing shallowly, trying to control herself - a warm tingling spreading through her body, head starting to swim in a not unpleasant manner, and she could always feel her heart beating in her chest as if she had been running outdoors at a brisk pace. What was wrong with her, to have these feelings, and worse - the desires that sometimes occurred to her now even in the daytime? She loved her sister so much and owed Elsa her life, and she knew Elsa loved her as well to have saved her and from all the time they'd been spending together - but why did her mind insist, over and over, of giving her flashes of her kissing her older sister, tasting her tongue, Elsa pinning her gently down or against a wall? Anna shivered again in her bed and hugged her plush pillow tight, attempting to clear her mind and force herself to relax - she needed to get back to sleep, instead of letting her mind obsess over recent events and silly fancies. She shut her eyes and tried to tune it out when another noise echoed through the silent castle halls, slowing her breathing. She was halfway to sleep when her bed chamber door slowly creaked open in the still night air, the moonlight from the window illuminating a slender figure with unbound silvery hair and luminous icy-blue eyes entering the room as silently as she could manage...


	2. Doubts And Snowflakes

Anna was snoring lightly and rolled halfway onto her side, one arm dangling out over the edge of the bed, knees slightly forward and her rump in the air, strands of red hair mussed over her face. Amused, Elsa merely watched her sister for a minute or so as her eyes adjusted to the dark room, the barest lingering heat from the fireplace wafting towards her now and then. The moonlight touched the woman, faintly causing her milk-pale skin to seem to glow. A few stray snowflakes drifted and swirled around Elsa on invisible currents. The Queen was dressed for bed as well, barefoot and arms uncovered, clad in a simple royal purple shift of thin wool. A few steps on the cold stone floor brought her to the side of her sister's bed, close enough to reach out and touch Anna if she so desired: Elsa extended one slender hand towards the girl's shoulder, a few small crystalline snowflakes swirling about her fingertips...then she paused, clutching her hand firmly into a fist.

The elder sister bit her lower lip and flexed her hand, unsure. What if she was wrong about this? Wrong about all of it? Conceal, she thought. If she moved forward with what she had been thinking of doing, what if Anna hated it or pulled away? It surely was abnormal, the feelings she had been having - this wasn't some peasant girl she had known since childhood or a new companion not of her blood: this was her sister. To think of her lustfully, even to consider kissing her, feeling her bare skin, holding her tight and telling her she wanted to only be with her always, make her feel good and warm her, protect her - surely this was wrong.

Don't feel, don't feel, Elsa told herself. Be the big sister, the friend, don't leave Anna: but give up the rest. It was a foolish fancy and could well destroy them both if things went wrong, if they were found out, even if Anna accepted any advance the Queen might make. But why would she...? It was unnatural of her to want, a poisonous shard of ice infecting her brain, clouding her judgment. She should know better than to let her actions be dictated by sentiment wholly, even if her love had saved Anna's life.

If Anna found out, or anyone, how they would judge her! The people of the kingdom and all their hard-won allies would be fearful again, view her as some vile sorceress with unnatural addictions, evidenced physically by her 'gifts' - the wicked Queen who could summon killing shards of ice and choking cold, and sought to corrupt her only remaining family with lewd suggestion and inappropriate intimacy. She was not that, she could not be that - she loved Anna too fiercely, and she could not leave her again. But nor should she act on her whims, no matter how much she might want to profess her love and desire for her precious sister. Some days it was all she could do to escape Anna's presence at last without letting some indication show of what she was thinking and feeling. Elsa could not bare to consider her action might once more cause Anna to be hurt, emotionally or otherwise, or to drive a wedge between them when they were at long last growing together again.

She was truly blessed to have Anna back in her life, to be able to see the young woman every day and spend any time she wished with her, finally acting like sisters again. The thought of dashing that relationship, shattering it like a fragile flower made of ice in a howling storm, made Elsa feel literally sick inside. She had been near hysterics when she saw Anna, seemingly dead, frozen solid on the icy lake. The towering ships overhead had creaked and groaned as the blizzard roared about her, all thought but anger and destruction and pain driven from her mind. Her sister, the one who had always sought her out and loved her, dead - and she had been too late, captured and threatened herself. And before that, she had abandoned the girl, then drove her away when dear Anna had come after her into the snowy mountains at great risk to her own safety. The red-haired young woman was as always passionate and exuberant, never giving up on Elsa, despite how much she may have been hurt in the past by her sister's reluctant neglect.

At times she thought Anna must be spurring her on, or wanting more - the way she gripped Elsa's hands, or laid back against her when they were alone together, how tightly she hugged her older sister. Once, she thought, Anna had nearly kissed her as they were making their way up a long stone staircase to the north corridor: Elsa had missed a step and briefly panicked, her arms grasping at empty air before she automatically produced a sudden thick burst of ice under one hand to steady herself. Anna had caught her as well and was grasping her around the waist to steady her, and their faces were inches apart - so close Elsa could have counted her sister's numerous freckles. Anna had flushed red quickly and nervously licked her lips, coming a little closer, her eyes wide and staring into Elsa's. The moment was broken suddenly by the loud chiming of that infernal clock in the main hall and the younger sister pulled away abruptly, muttering about those stairs being a menace, her cheeks bright red.

The Queen gazed down at the drowsing form of her sister, her thoughts conflicted and aswirl like a snowstorm. She was so close, and looked so cold, so alone...but she must not reveal herself, she musn't show what she wanted. She could destroy everything, as she almost had years ago. Her hand reached out involuntarily, fingers flexing, holding her breath. Elsa yearned for the warmth of Anna, to hold her even if only that was allowable, to cradle her all night long, to run fingers in her red hair - most of all, to see her dear sister looking at her with her green eyes and to hear her say 'I love you' once more. Her heart felt tight and constricted, frozen in her chest. She could not do it. It may be harder still in days to come to wall herself off in that manner from Anna, without neglecting her, with the younger woman right there at all hours - but she must. She had no choice, she could not express her true feelings. Her hand lowered slowly and she sighed almost inaudibly. Give up, don't reveal, be strong, she told herself.

At that moment, a large clump of snow fell off the tree directly outside the bedchamber's windows and hit the frozen ground. Anna stirred once, stretching, rolled over - and met Elsa's eyes directly, her gaze clear and newly wide awake. A grin touched her soft lips and her eyes widened in surprise, smile lines forming around her soft cheeks, and the moon illuminated her from behind.

"Elsa...you're here, you came...to see me? Am I asleep?". The redhead slowly pushed herself up, beaming shyly, her slender frame revealed fairly well by the rough grey nightshirt she wore: the curve of her hip, her long legs, red hair streaming over one shoulder. Elsa drew in her breath, trying to control herself. Be calm, she thought. Don't let her see. But Anna was up now and sitting cross-legged, regarding her older sister curiously, a hesitant, hopeful look on her slightly rounded face. She started to speak, then bit off her words, cheeks flushed slightly.

"I...Elsa, please. Will you stay? C-come, come to bed, I'm cold", Anna managed at last, looking down at her hands, seeing them shaking visibly. She stole a glance up at her sister, looking radiant in the pale moonlight, the uncertainty written on her face for a few seemingly endless seconds. Then her big sister slowly grinned at her and reached out for Anna, taking her offered hand, not resisting when the younger woman pulled her forward gently. Elsa scarcely dared breath, for fear this all might evaporate as a dream - was it really happening? Could she let it? What if Anna changed her mind or she was misreading this entirely? She moved forward towards her sister - whatever was going to happen next, she'd come too far and loved her sister too much to hurt her by pulling away now.

Outside, clouds drifted slowly across the face of the winter moon, dimming the pale light over the castle. The snow began to fall harder, silently, over the tall towers and quiet courtyards.


	3. Aspects Of Control

Anna lay propped on her side, nervously gazing at her sister across from her, their hands lightly clasped together. She shivered and her thin shoulders shook softly, autumnal red hair falling across her face. What the hell should she do now? Elsa was here, finally here, in her bed. Her older sister was regarding her just as cautiously, a shy, unsure smile on her lips, her large blue eyes solemnly regarding Anna. The younger girl lightly gave Elsa's cold hand a squeeze, running her fingers over the woman's slender digits, then stroking her palm. She cleared her throat nervously as she felt her heart pounding out of control in her chest.

Elsa herself was hyper-aware of everything going on around her: the rough texture of the furs piled on Anna's bed, the soft skin of her sister's fingers, the small motes of dust and moisture dancing where the moonlight from the window hit them, the younger woman's nervous, slow breathing. She knew she was balanced precariously now - she wanted Anna's love so badly, and to love her, to know her, but one wrong step and she might endanger them both, or crush her little sister's desires or drive her away. She felt as if she was striding carefully over a frozen river, unable to see where the ice might be melting, rotting away beneath her feet. She had to be careful not to break the thin layer connecting them, or she might fall away into darkness, the intimacy between them lost.

At last, the silver-haired woman forced herself to act. She scooted a little closer, noting well how Anna's eyes widened and she blushed. This was her sister, her best friend, the one who had always sought her out and forgiven her, pushed her to be better than Elsa thought she could be. Anna believed in her and knew her sibling could do the right thing, could be strong. She had to cast aside her doubts at least a little. The feelings she had for the girl could not be denied or shrugged off - love had reunited them, had saved the spunky younger girl's life when she was willing to die to protect Elsa. She had to trust in that and once more let go, let herself shine through. She wanted Anna more badly in that moment than she ever had before, but her mouth was dry and her limbs felt heavy and clumsy. Every movement felt awkward to her, but she made herself lick her lips and speak.

"I think you know...Anna, you feel the same, I think. These months with you, getting to know you, see how wonderful a young woman you are...they've been the best months of my life. I am sorry I ran from you, but being alone made me discover more about myself, things I never considered when I had to be around others and hide my powers, who I was. I know I scared you, I know I shoved you away, I know how I harmed you was terrible. But I've been trying since I got back to deny what I feel, deny part of myself again. My...wanting, for you. I've seen you looking at me too. I didn't dare tell you or act, what if I was wrong, what if someone saw? I was frightened again, and it hurt, to feel I had to deny myself once more. I felt like if anyone knew, if you knew - I'd be a monster. A terrible woman who not only could kill people with ice and snow if I lost control, someone to be feared, but worse...someone who'd corrupt and pervert her only family, her younger sister. But I've wanted you so fucking badly these past weeks, for us to finally be together all the way."

When the curse escaped her lips, Elsa froze, as if shocked to hear such come from her unbidden. Her icy cheeks colored the vaguest hint of scarlet and her eyes darted downwards. Surely now Anna would run, would look at her with disgust or pity. Why, why, why had she said those poisonous words aloud? Conceal, she thought, with growing dismay. How had she erred so badly to let her feelings show? She lay there deathly still, daring not to glance at Anna, mere inches away from her. The Queen felt the bedcovers shift, and soft sounds told her the redhaired girl was moving towards her. Small tears threatened to escape her eyes and Elsa gulped nervously, hands twisting themselves together. She felt a small, warm hand touch her chin, and gave in when Anna gently tilted her face upwards. The younger girl was closer than ever, and she shifted softly, so her legs gently pressed against Elsa's, smooth skin contrasting against the rough nightshirt she wore.

Anna's face filled Elsa's vision even as she felt the small tears escape her eyes and freeze instantly against her skin. Her sister was gazing at her with barely concealed nervousness mingling with the beginnings of pure glee. Every freckle across her nose and cheeks stood out against her milky skin, and her wide green eyes seemed large enough for Elsa to get lost in if not careful. Anna's lips were soft and just barely red, paler where she had bitten the lower one. Very slowly, Anna let go of Elsa's chin and softly drifted her slender hand down the older lass's side, tracing her hip, the swell of her leg.

"Elsa. Listen to me. I know you're scared, I know - believe me, I know. How strange it feels. I've wanted you but I tried so hard to tell myself to stop. That I couldn't, we never could, you'd think I was insane or wanting attention or confused or full of some bizarre determination that never could be real. I've seen you looking at me, and it terrified me sometimes, I didn't understand. But I know that together...I think I've helped you, and I know for sure you help me in ways you don't even imagine. I need you. I love you, big sister. I want you too. I think I'd...well, I'd be so fucking happy if you needed me. If you told me I was...I was yours."

On those last words, Anna stammered, her voice faltering. She never thought she'd say that aloud, let alone to her beautiful, imposing, beloved sister. She idolized Elsa and she knew how lost she'd be without the woman, both for saving her and loving her, and for guiding her and advising her as she grew up and took more responsibility in the kingdom. But it was true, what her heart wanted, deep down. She needed to be with Elsa, couldn't stand the thought of being without her, wanted to be hers, in any way the her beloved sister wanted.

Elsa was stunned at those words, as well, in her own way. She felt a warmth deep inside starting to grow, a desire, and she cleared her throat. Anna was right there before her, asking for the Queen to love her, reaffirming the things Elsa herself had thought over the past weeks and months. She needed to act, and act now - she just silently prayed she did this right. Her sister was her whole world now, her companion, her best friend, and all the family she wanted or needed. She took a deep breath to focus and calm herself, met her sister's eyes, and said the words she knew to be true:

"Anna, you're mine."

At those words, the princesses's eyes widened startlingly, and she gasped softly, red flush immediately spreading over her round cheeks. She barely had time to process what Elsa had just said and was reaching out to her slowly when she found the older woman was kissing her, arms wrapped fully around Anna's thin frame.

Elsa's lips were fuller and very soft, and she slowly slid her hand up Anna's neck to cradle her head, stroking her hair. The redhead shivered softly and gave in, kissing gently back at first, before deepening it, lightly sucking the woman's lower lip, pressing forward till she felt the hard surface of Elsa's teeth beneath her mouth. Her arms wrapped around her sister, one rubbing her shoulders. She hesitated, heart beating wildly, before she went for it - slid her other hand down Elsa's back and lightly gripped the woman's rump, squeezing the soft flesh there, which elicited a surprise soft moan from the silver-haired lass. Encouraged, Anna kissed her again, this time softly biting at her lips with the barest edge of her teeth, feeling Elsa squirm against her body. She had never imagined it could be like this, this intense, this warm. She pulled back softly, planting a gentle kiss on Elsa's lips before she spoke.

"I love you, Elsa. I'm yours forever. I need you. Please...keep me? Don't go away again?"

Elsa looked back, her body seemingly aflame with sensation, panting softly. Her arms were loosely draped around her sister, holding her close. She spoke softly, but firmly, meeting Anna's eyes.

"Never. I love you so much."

And with that, she was kissing Anna again, this time not hesitating much before initiating more herself: a gentle bite on her sister's cheek, then nibbling her lips, forcing her mouth open gently so she could slide her tongue into the girl's mouth. She wanted to taste her, to explore. Anna was hers now and she had to do everything she could for the girl, both privately between them and in their 'normal' duties and lives. Anna sucked her tongue back softly, darting teeth along it, making Elsa shiver and softly moan. The sisters pressed together ever closer, the cold forgotten, duty forgotten - they had each other, and nothing from now on would drive them apart.

It appeared they would have a long night ahead of them.


End file.
